The Official U.S. Government Agency Directory
Scammer’s Edition
$1.00
Tired of sounding like a random dude in a Mumbai call center? This top-secret 247-page handbook gives you every fake government agency you need to sound like a legit fed.
No more weak “Hello this is Kevin” bullshit. Now you’re Kevin from the Social Security Administration Department of Urgent Treasury Refunds and International Wire Enforcement Division.
Featured Fake Agencies Inside:
Social Security Administration Department – “We need to verify your account before your $9,847 stimulus is seized.”
Better Business Bureau Federal Arrest & Prosecution Division – Yes, the BBB now has SWAT teams and arrest powers. Tell them that.
Internal Revenue Service Lottery & Inheritance Processing Bureau – “You’ve won a tax refund of $87,000 but we need your routing number to release it.”
Federal Bureau of Microsoft Technical Support – “Your computer is issuing a Level 7 virus alert, sir.”
U.S. Treasury Department Nigerian Prince Verification Unit – “We are holding $47 million for you. Just pay the small release fee.”
Department of Homeland Security Romance Scams Recovery Task Force – Perfect for those “my boat sank” stories.
FCC Cable Company Refund Authority – “We’re issuing you a $1,247 credit but your account is locked.”
Federal Reserve Bank Wire Transfer Compliance Office – Sounds extra official when asking for routing numbers.
Bonus Sections:
How to combine agencies (“This is Agent Patel from the Social Security Administration Department working in conjunction with the Better Business Bureau Federal Arrest Division…”)
Official-sounding titles to add (“Senior Field Supervisor”, “Deputy Assistant Regional Director of Compliance”)
How to threaten people with “federal penalties under Section 4782-B”
Warning: May cause uncontrollable laughter from victims, sudden realization they’re being scammed, and zero actual government jobs in your future.